The Big Black Balloon of Depression by Violette Clark

I suffer from depression from time to time. One of the things that has saved me is art - time and time again. Recently in a telephone coaching session my coach asked me some questions about how I felt after getting certain things done. I pretty much dismissed what I had done feeling like it was not enough. Very casually I mentioned "the void" and then she was off and running with it. I noticed I was quite annoyed because I did not want to talk about the void at all - I wanted to talk about my business, accomplishing more, being more organized etc. But she kept at it asking me what colour it was, what shape it was and where I was in relation to it. I had to muster all of my energy just so i didn't scream "I DON'T FREAKING WANT TO TALK ABOUT THE VOID OKAY????!!!"

What emerged was the big black balloon. It was interesting to me that I was on top of the balloon and not inside it. As we were talking I was mindlessly doodling - what emerged was a tiny person ontop of a large black balloon. My coach and I established a few things about the balloon story and I pretty much decided that it would become a little comic strip. That was my homework.

So yesterday I was in a very dark place - it was pouring down rain, the sky was dark, all of my lovely flowers were being mushed and the magic garden did not look so magic anymore. I decided that I  needed to either:

1. Go back to bed and pull the covers over my head or

2. Make the black balloon comic strip.

Thankfully number  2 won out.

What can you do when..... 
you are visited by the big black balloon or the dark dog or whatever name seems to suit your dark moods and feelings? Why not remove all distractions such as the radio, TV, text messaging, internet surfing, phone calls and sit still. Listen to yourself. You have an inner knowing that will tell you what to do next. Create a piece of art around the guidance that you are given. When you are stumped simply ask "What's next?" If you listen closely you will find the answers.

My name is Violette Clark and I'm am an artist passionate about creating art journals.

Comments

[Melissa]

hi violette!
what a wonderful and inspiring post.
this exercise really allows us to communicate with ourselves. I believe this is the key to feeling good since no one else can make you feel good but you!

i think more people would feel good if they just stopped to hear what they have to say.
:) melissa

[Kara aka Mother Henna]

Violette, I loooooooooove your big black balloon comic!! Been having one of those weeks myself -- was very helpful to read your post here and see the comic. I forget sometimes that tuning it all out and being still *really works*! Funny but doing nothing seems really hard in the moments I need it most sometimes...
zillion xo's and miracles to you!
k-

[violette]

Thank you kara and melissa for you comments. We are powerful beyond measure....we just need to be still and listen!

love, Violette

[bettyann]

Thanks Violette for sharing your feelings on your big black balloon..Sunday was the pits for me also..I have a black pit....take care..